“If you’re going through hell, keep going.” — Winston Churchill
I had something written. It was kind of long. I don’t really feel like editing and posting it right now though.
So instead, I’ll do that next year and write something short for this end.
This year has been one of the most challenging in my adult life. Years and years of trauma and stress and anxiety finally hit a boiling point and I was forced, by myself, to take a break.
I’ve experienced layers of loss, topped off by my Dad dying 8 days before my birthday. So, I managed to experience 3 events with the lack of my father within a a few months on 3 days of supposed import.
This has not been a holly holiday at all. I am ready for next year. I know it’s just a social construct, and a reminder that what’s was is past is nice.
This year has had its bright spots. It catalyzed action on a few different thought processes that seem to be beginning to sustain themselves. This is a good thing.
I’m slowly figuring out how to better manage my ADHD, which is good. Processing the impact of how it has possibly contributed to my past has been extremely difficult though. There is a severe lack of fun here.
And all of this happening has my mind time traveling quite heavily. Which is wild. Remembering things that were experienced and buried in the back of my brain.
There have been those positive events ant things though, and I am grateful for the those. They have helped sustain me.
I am ready for tomorrow.